The Trials and Tribulations of a Breast Fetish
by sayneverdie
Summary: Sirius Black loves boobs of all descriptions. And Casey, our hero and the girl who's in love with him, is far from busty. Watch as she goes from humiliation to success and back again, while she tries to win his heart. rated M for smutlanguagesome slash.


Boarding the Hogwarts Express in my first year, I never thought that I would meet the love of my life.

He _is _the love of my life.

Sirius Black is a god.

Honestly, it's almost painful to look at him.

All of the girl's want him and so do most of the boys.

Even a few of the teachers wouldn't mind having Sirius Black in their bed.

Sirius and I are absolutely perfect for each other.

Except… Sirius Black loves breasts.

Big, plump, bouncy, tumbling, squeezable, luscious breasts.

…or so he puts it.

And I… all I have are these little mounds on my chest, each with a miniscule, erm, nipply on top.

That was a fairly cute description.

Except for they aren't remotely cute.

They're bloody pathetic.

Point is, they're all I've got, and that just won't cut it with Sirius Black.

And so my life slips into the boring lull of tragically aching tragicness.

Which, all in all, is quite… um, tragic?

Anyways, at the present, I'm in my seventh year at Hogwarts, and I'm sitting in my dorm.

Staring.

At my breasts.

And wondering if just maybe, Sirius doesn't mind booblings.

You know, instead of full boobs.

But of course he minds.

This is extremely depressing.

Well, I've gone down to dinner.

I didn't want to, but seeing as it's the second night back at Hogwarts, and I've hardly socialized at all, I figured it would be polite.

And actually, I'm having quite a bit of fun.

Me and my best mate Lily are chucking bits of our dinner at Sirius and James Potter, which is proving to be highly amusing, seeing as they both swat the air and look around with these very stupid expressions whenever we hit them.

Basically, very entertaining.

Dinner's over, and I'm on my way back to the common room. Lily's gone to send a letter to her parents, so I'm on my own.

Perfect way to get raped, I know.

And I've heard Severus Snape has his eye on me.

Vomit.

Anyway, I'm on my way back and the most horrific thing happens. I pass by Sirius, James, and their two cronies Remus Lupin and some fat child whose name escapes me (although I've known him for seven years… that's really snobby of me, isn't it?).

So I'm walking past them, and they all hush up for a moment.

Sirius looks at, unless I am mistaken, my butt and yells, "Hey honey… you here for some lovin?"

I blush a fantastic shade of crimson, and oddly… so does Remus Lupin.

He elbows Sirius in the ribs and looks down, and Sirius laughs even harder and chokes out something unintelligible to James who also looks at my backside and begins to laugh.

Sensing something might be wrong with me, I sneak a look at my butt…

And positively die of embarrassment.

Because, lo and behold, I've gotten my period. And I've bled through my pants.

Brilliant.

Bloody brilliant.

Tying my robe around my waist, I try to gather any dignity I may still possess and walk away.

Unfortunately, this really is not my night, because in my hurry to escape the scene, I fall flat on my face.

"What d'you reckon, James? Shall we help the poor miss out?" Sirius asks, and I can hear that he's on the verge of cracking up again.

But James can't answer, he's laughing too hard.

It's then that I feel a warm, reassuring hand on my arm, and I look up to see Remus Lupin.

"C'mon, let's get you back to the common room," he says quietly, not looking me in the eye.

I can only nod tearfully and follow him, the echoing laughter of the other boys behind me.

We're silent all the way back to the common room, a silence filled with embarrassment and… more embarrassment.

Once we've scrambled through the portrait hole, he looks at me briefly and says, "You'd uh… you'd better go get cleaned up."

And then he turns and practically runs up the stairs to his dormitory.

I decide to follow his advice and clean up before the other three boys return.

And I think that, just maybe, I could have been wrong about Sirius Black.


End file.
